Today, I went on a walk in the neighborhood. The first thing I notice, is there are more birds, squirrels and cats than there are people out and about. In Taiwan, there are people everywhere. I notice the multiple differences daily – yet, that is not what this entry is about. I borrowed Jackie’s mp3 player and headed out for my walk this morning, it was not until this song/lyrics came on that I was able to be honest with the Lord with the many emotions going on within me. Since we arrived back in the US in late March, I’ve struggled with understanding “grief”. Grief of missing Taiwan, the people I am involved with, the ministry, the discipleship, the relational witnessing. But I am quickly reminded how, while living in Taiwan, I experience grief of missing family and friends as well as being regularly involved/updated in their lives. Listening to this song today helps me accept, that no matter where I am, I will have grief of physical separation, and bottom line is being in God’s will (be that in Taiwan or Texas) does not spare me of separational grief .

The lyrics are set to a tender hearted melody.

“All I Want To Do” – Ginny Owens

All I want to do, is give this life to You
All I want to do, is give this life to You
All I want to do, is give this life to You
And let Your will be done, until it’s all I want to do.

How does doubt slip in, so silently?
And why does condemnation come so naturally?
Why do I still get the best of me?
Loving so little and living so selfishly?

When all I want to do, is give this life to You.
All I want to do is give this life to You.
All I want to do is give this life to You,
and let Your will be done until it’s all I want to do.

What have I been given by Your grace?
Will I come to understand this mystery I embrace?
Make of me a new creation now,
Fill me with all you are and be all I am some how.

Cuz all I want to do is give this life to You.
All I want to do is give this life to You.
All I want to do is give this life to You
And let Your will be done, until it’s all I want to do.

Faith so fragile
Reaching for Your hand

All I want to do, is give this life to You.
All I want to do, is give this life to You.
All I want to do, is give this life to You,
and let your will be done, til it’s all I want to do.
And let your will be done, til it’s all I want to do.

 

Lord, Help me embrace those I am blessed to be with each moment; may grief of missing others, not rob me of the ability and opportunity of embracing being in your will moment by moment.

Lord, giving my life to you is truly all I want to do. Hold my heart, keep me from missing you, your blessings, and the love offering found in all relationships, no matter where they may be, no matter where I may be. Lord, thank you for your comforting promise in Matthew 28:20… “I am with you always, even to the end of the age”. Thank you that I will never experience seperational grief in my relationship with you. In Christ’s strength and in His sweet name I pray. Amen.