Mission Moment #1
July 23, 2007

A “Mission Moment” my friend Lynn describes as “something to read that’s a window into your life on the mission field (victories or a struggle). This will help the ladies to put flesh and blood on the concept of an International Missionary.”

This is a challenge. To date, we are 19 days and counting until our return to the field after a 5 month stateside assignment (old term = furlough).
The struggle that pricks my soul….. is: Have I given everyone that part of me that they need while I was here? Also, have I seized what I need to take back with me as a treasured moment to ponder upon when times get tough, when I feel like an alien, or get blasted with the enemies words of attack that cause me to ask “and what am I doing here?”

During our seven years of living in Taiwan as an IMB missionary, I’ve come and gone back to Texas several times, for either a vacation or a “turn around” assignment time period. For the first time, I can finally say, that Taiwan is home now. I think that represents a resolve that I was unaware needed to be resolved until this time here in Texas. Does that mean that Texas is no longer home? Of course not, for it will always be home, and let’s face it, wherever my family is, will always be home, even if I have to hunt them down in another state or continent.

So I have 2 homes…Texas, and Taiwan. Sounds like a rending of the heart right? Yes, this does not come without pains of the heart. The resolve always comes back to the same thing that re-stirs the peace that surpasses all understanding. That is, being in God’s will, doing what he has called us to do, where he has called us to do it, and being content until he changes that.

The attacks of doubt always come, when I’m awakened in the middle of the night, be it from physical discomforts that come with the aging process, or be it the startling events such as ambulances, police cars or helicopters searching the neighborhood in the darkest hours of the night. So I get up and read. The most efficient balm to sooth the aching heart is always found in the Psalms.

You see, international missionaries are no different from anyone whose home remains in Texas or any other homeland. We hurt, we have doubts, and we need God to remind us who we are, and that he has a blueprint that doesn’t exclude the emotional and physical (and yes even spiritual) aches and pains of daily living.

So, it’s 19 days and counting, and I ask myself, have I given everyone a part of me that needs a part, and am I taking back with me the treasures I need to get me through until I see them next time (which dangles within a date of uncertainty)?

There’s a place in the heart that I only let God touch. It hurts too bad to let anyone else touch it. Do you have one of those places in your heart? Relief comes only when I talk to my Lord Jesus, and willingly allow my heart to open like a budding rose, and invite him to come in to visit like only the light of the sun can penetrate a budding rose. Determined, as long as possible, I allow His love to penetrate the private place of pain, for HIM alone to linger and minister. Then he leads me to Psalm 139 and it is there he pours his words of loving affirmation. The budding pain slowly closes back up, and we nod in agreement “until we meet again”.

Just A moment with:
Fran

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